Jane

I cannot recall now how I found them.  The internet has evolved into a much more search-friendly place now.  But I was pregnant for the first time, and I had found a list of women who were all expecting babies in August 1996, and I decided to join the conversation.  And my life was forever changed.

Those August 1996 babies are 13 now.  The topics have changed with the ages of our kids and as life events have unfolded.  Many of us remain together, connected by our computers. And our hearts.  We have been there for each other in the face of both joy and horrible tragedy.  It is truly a pool of love, support, friendship and vast parenting savvy, and I am so very privileged to be among their company.

Tonight we are one fewer in number.  Cancer, that vicious and insidious disease, has taken our beautiful Jane.

I don’t know if it was as fast for her as it seemed for us.  She never once moaned about her condition.  She never once posted of self-pity.  She was a model of grace and acceptance, from the day she told us of her illness, to her recent last posts on searching for a hospice.  She mentioned to us that she only had weeks left to live.  And only a few days later, she was gone.  My heart simply aches for her family.

Life is a frail and delicate thing.  Embrace the joy that comes your way.  Share your heart.  And hug your kids.

Good-bye sweet Jane.  And thank you for sharing the last 14 years with us.  I truly hope you knew that our lives are richer for having known you.  We will miss you and love you always.  xo

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4 Responses to “Jane”


  1. 1 Bon January 20, 2010 at 8:44 pm

    i am so sorry about your friend…your tribute is beautiful, K.A.

  2. 2 hugyourkids January 20, 2010 at 10:58 pm

    I’m so sorry for the death of Jane to cancer. (I don’t say “loss,” no one was irresponsible and lost her, like they lose their keys.) I also had a child die from cancer, so I kind of know what they’re going through, although every child and family is unique, so no one ever really knows what another is going through.

    We lost our son Mark suddenly to brain cancer in 1998. He was 8 1/2 years old. That’s why we started Global Hug Your Kids Day in 2008. Maybe you or Jane’s family would like to have an event in YOUR town in Jane’s honor for the holiday in 2010. It’ll be Monday, July 19. Contact me via http://www.hugyourkidstoday.com or for more info. I’m hoping to get families all over the US / world? to have events in honor of their wonderful children on that day.

  3. 3 LSM January 20, 2010 at 11:25 pm

    Beautiful tribute. The whole thing just doesn’t feel “real” yet to me.

  4. 4 Quadelle January 21, 2010 at 6:18 am

    How wonderful to have those friends, how sad that Jane has died so young. What a beautiful tribute.


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