Yet Another Grocery Rant

It seems a fair amount of my rants concern grocery shopping and this is no exception. 

I’ve discussed my aggravation with shoppers who stop in the middle of the aisle (neither left nor right).  I’ve mentioned carts with bad wheels.  I’ve probably even noted the challenges of shopping with young kids.  But do you know who deserves the most wrath in the whole grocery shopping experience????  It’s Little Miss Can’t Count, that’s who.

Now, I’m not talking about the person who tries to sneek in 12 items in the express line.  Been there.  Done that.  No big deal.  I’m talking about the woman with the major jumbo cart, filled to the brim, with probably 150 items, in the express lane.  The 10 items or less lane.  The bag your own items thank you very much lane. 

Don’t bother to look surprised when you hand the clerk your reusable bags and she tells you that you bag your own in Express.  Don’t pretend to just notice the express lane signage at that very moment.  Don’t turn to me, next in line, and give me a pithy “I’m sorry.”  Ya’ know why?  Because I just saw you give the clerk your frequent shopper card!  A frequent shopper card suggests that maybe you’ve been in this particular store before and know exactly which lines are for 10 items or less.  And even if your usual store is another store in this chain, every single one of these stores has the first two aisles as Express.  And what’s more, given that you can afford to buy 150 items at a time I’m guessing you probably have the education to count beyond ten.  So, please know that while I’m waiting for you to have your 150 items rung in, and then waiting for you to get the heck out of my way while you bag your 150 items, I am not thinking kind thoughts about you. 

Do you know what I’d wish they’d have done?  I wish they had only rang in ten items at a time and made you go to the back of the line 15 times.  Perhaps that would not only reinforce your counting skills but help you remember for the next time which line up is Express.  Yes… I really think that would have been in your best interest.  And I’m nice like that.

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5 Responses to “Yet Another Grocery Rant”


  1. 1 Janet July 7, 2008 at 11:15 am

    I saw someone with TWO full carts in the express line. In our particular store, the express line does not have a conveyer belt to pile everything up on. It’s one little bitty area about a foot square. I asked the clerk (when I finally got up there with my two items) why the guy was allowed to stay in the line. She roller her eyes at me and said in complete disgust: “We can’t say anything to them about it. It’s ‘poor customer service.’ ” I’ve been intending to write to the management. The Mountain man suggested something similar to yours, that the machine itself could be programmed to only accept 10 items at once. That way the clerks could get rid of them and be able to blame it on the computer.

  2. 2 Calvin July 7, 2008 at 11:44 am

    I have heard the “Customer Service” excuse the stores give for not enforcing the 10 items rule. My reply is: “When I am in a hurry and only have a few items, the express lane is a service to me, your other customer. When you let people break the rule, you are giving me poor service and the guy behind me and the gal behind him.” And, of course, it falls on deaf ears.

  3. 3 tpgoddess0103 July 7, 2008 at 12:13 pm

    Wow – I appreciate my store even more now! I’ve actually seen them kick out people who try to “oopsie” into the express lane with more than 12 items! I guess our store manager sees it as Calvin expressed it – and how I view it too. Love the idea of programming the machine to only accept the limited number of items!!

  4. 4 Robin July 7, 2008 at 12:27 pm

    I love your solution to this problem.

  5. 5 Alto2 July 8, 2008 at 12:35 am

    I love the solution, too, but who’s supposed to unload all Miss Piggy’s stuff off the belt and back into her cart so she can go to the end of the line?


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