To The Drive-Thru Coffee Staff

I only treat myself to a coffee drive-thru two times a week… once on my way to Tuesday night class, and once on my way to work Saturday mornings. It may be only $3 to you, but it is an indulgence to me. Don’t mess with my experience.

So, you know on Saturday mornings when EVERYONE in town is in the lineup either waiting for their order or waiting to place their order? Let me remind you that “line up” suggests the cars are not moving. Therefore, if I am nine yards and half a car length behind your metal speaker box, don’t even bother to say “Welcome to **’s. Can I take your order?” I’m not freaking there yet. The only way you can take my order from that distance is if I have a megaphone. And if I have a megaphone I don’t likely need the metal speaker box.

Then there’s the girl who rushes my order. The one who runs her words together to try and push things along quickly… “WelcomeTo**’sCanITakeYourOrder?” Guess what, honey… that lady in the van who can never find her change in the mornings knows exactly where her change is. I’m just messing with you because you’re annoying me with your high speed pressure. I don’t care how many cars are behind me. I don’t care how many are in front of me. Allow me to feel that it is permissible to breathe when I speak to you, and we’ll all get through this a lot faster.

And what exactly is the deal with always putting the drinky part of the cover right on the seam of the cup? Do you go to classes to learn that? Because that’s annoying me too.

Ok… remind me again why I do this as a treat?

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3 Responses to “To The Drive-Thru Coffee Staff”


  1. 1 Christina November 22, 2006 at 9:10 pm

    Hah! The local McD’s does that talking to you before are in front of the speaker things too! Drives me NUTS. The worst is when I *could* be up there, but the idiot in front of me seems to have an aversion to being anything less than 8 feet from the nearest car and will not roll all the way forward.

  2. 2 djn November 23, 2006 at 5:50 am

    LOL… I wish I could help you out. I am only a recent convert who decided it’s not so much of a treat to go to these places. I don’t want to treat people poorly but in an effort to lessen my sugarn intake I have begged them to give me a “Cabrick” style chai tea. They NEVER do. I have been assured that all people have been trained on this more healthy style of preparing tea but it never happens so I give up. I’m much happier making it myself.

    Gobble gobble! (Happy Thanksgiving!)

  3. 3 Robin November 23, 2006 at 5:30 pm

    LOL! I admire a good rant and you’re one of the best ranters I’ve come across lately.


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